For Self Starters

UNDERSTANDING IT COGNITIVELY

Understanding Trauma

Healing from Trauma

DOING THE WORK

Books While Doing the Work

Modalities That Worked for Me

BUILDING YOUR TOOL KIT

Emotional or Psychological Safety

Something that is absolutely key to healing from complex trauma is finding a group of likeminded people where it is psychologically safe to be you, make mistakes, and experiment with your communication style. Ultimately this means that you surround yourself with a Team You that encourages you to be authentically you, flawed and all, mistakes and all, emotions and all.

For me, it meant:

  • Relearning how to relate to people. I joined a Facebook group focused on healing from complex trauma. Here, I overcame my debilitating fear of expressing myself.
  • Relearning how to speak in public. I participated in my local Toastmaster’s Club and learned how to take constructive feedback while presenting in an impromptu manner.
  • Relearning how to accept help. I worked with therapists and coaches. I learned to let go of my need to constantly be right. Instead, I learned to make mistakes, be OKAY with that, learn from it, and move on. I learned how to feel my emotions without the added layers of shame, blame, and guilt.
  • Relearning how to do something as a complete beginner. I am an amateur podcaster. I identify people who fascinate me and ask them to guest on my Sandwich Parenting Podcast. I have no idea what I’m doing, but this work is about learning, growing, and meeting incredibly amazing people doing incredibly amazing work that makes the world a better place.
  • Relearning how to collaborate. I partner with Chapter Zero, an organization dedicated to advocating for Respectful Parenting in Singapore. We now run trauma-informed group coaching programs in support of stressed out parents who are finding it difficult to manage their triggers.
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